Christmas sometimes means saving every penny because you're spending every penny on presents. And few places are better to witness the parsimony than in the Chinese community. It's a cold and dreary day, and I just thought taking the taxi on a five-minute ride would be worth it compared to walking to the subway, waiting for the subway in the cold and then walking from the subway to where we were going to go for dimsum. It would probably have cost an extra 3 or 4 dollars. But my Dad was complaining about the dollar he spent on a pirate DVD that didn't even play what it claimed.
I went with my Mom, who is at least as cheap as my Dad. This is the environment I had grown up in, efficiency in time, space, and of course, money spending. I was impressed last night when she told me that Grandmother managed to pay off her mortgage to a condo in Jersey in just a few years with the meager income she had as a live-in housekeeper. That's the attitude, the tradition, we hold not only as Chinese but more precisely, Chinese immigrants who are living, apparently, in constant fear of destitution. Going to the subway has nearly always been a game of how to pay as little as possible by taking advantage of the Metro-card system. It's never illegal, just creative ways to save money. They used to share one monthly-pass. This time she refused the taxi option because she already had her monthly pass and she had an extra card for me. Why waste the extra possibly 4 dollars for comfort?? Sometimes I feel that comfort for them is something to enjoy after death.
When we arrived in the neighborhood full of Chinese shops, a mini Chinatown in the middle of an very ethnically diverse southern part of Brooklyn, we walked past a new Chinese eatery. (There are no restaurants here as the parsimony of the immigrants can't allow for the extravagance of a restaurant, I think.) My Mother immediate commented that it's probably very cheap there, but then again, it's a risk. Risk. Risk of getting bad food. So it's not about scrunching every penny, it's about efficacy: get the most out of your buck. And food is important in Chinese culture, people are in general more uptight about food than are many cultures I know. Why not? Food is one of the two things you have to pay for to survive: the other is shelter (which explains the general urgency among immigrants to buy a house). So we didn't risk our palates with that newly opened eatery with discounted food. Besides, there's hardly anyone inside.
Unlike where we ended up going: all packed. We had to wait a good ten minutes. My Mother wasn't a fan of waiting. What was the point of wasting time if you could just order take out (and take out doesn't require coughing up tips). Instead of lecturing her about the importance of sitting and relaxing, I simply said that the food would get cold by the time we got home. Yes, that would be bad, not only would the food be less savory, but you have lost some of your money. That was the thought process I was expecting her to be having when she agreed to wait.
Another thing about Chinese customs is that it's very common to share a table with strangers. Most tables were huge, family size, even though the eatery is tiny. Chinese people don't usually go and have lunch somewhere; they are much more efficient than that. Most would just make their own food, and others would just order take out. So when they do go it's usually for a family get together where it's harder to make so much food and, I think, they actually would enjoy the atmosphere. So we waited while my stomach got emptier just smelling the amazing dimsum and watching the families inspecting and maybe grabbing one of the plates of savory items from the women who were walking around the tables holding trays of these stomach filling palate satiating treats.
By the time we sat down, with a table of a family of many people, the line behind us had grown a lot. My Mom said it's pricier here. That was her first statement. So people were willing to pay to have good food, reinforcing my view that whenever money is exchanged, it's always a bargaining process wherein you must figure out what to pay that would give you the greatest yield. The tea, at least, is free, and it's not a cheap, generic jasmine tea, but a mix of chrysanthemum and pu'er, both by themselves my favorite but now mixed together, even better. I was super hungry by then, and I wanted to start ordering. But even I was starting to think in that efficient manner. What should I order that would maximum my experience here at minimum cost. I didn't want to try too many familiar things, and even with familiar things like the rice noodle stuffed with ground pork I only took one so I had space in the stomach for others. And when I didn't like two of the things I picked, I made a mental note on the lesson learned for next time so that, overall, life was a constant progression of lessons learned and increased efficiency. Funny thing is that I wasn't quite aware of what I was doing, but neither was I completely oblivious of my habits that were reflecting the general norms around me.
Towards the end, two "foreigners" sat next to us. For the Chinese immigrants here, most of whom came very recently, all non-Chinese were "foreigners", including the these two ladies who spoke with the purest of Brooklynese. I saw them waiting in line like everyone else, and I wondered if they would do as the Romans (us) and share a table. Indeed, they shared our table along with another family once the first, bigger family had left. Another thing about the Chinese is that they aren't really into lounging around after food with a cup of coffee and chat. Chatting happens during eating so that by the time eating is done, the purpose of dining is over. I don't think this is something practiced in China in general as tea is something to savor not only with food, but here, in the quasi-representative microcosm of that country inside a very different country, people are different, and in the end, neither like the Chinese nor like the two ladies sitting next to me now. The younger one seemed to know what to get, including a dimsum that I never had seen before and wished, by then, had the space in the stomach to fill it. It was a mini version of this traditional way of steaming sticky rich and pork or chicken with spices inside bamboo leaves. My Mother commented with some admiration and surprise that the two knew how to use chopsticks. I didn't want to tell her that all but one of my friends knew how to use chopsticks as well as I did.
Besides these two anomalies, the rest are Chinese immigrants, residents of this microcosm of super-efficiency. Just to make one more point. There are some dimsums here that I would like to order out for later, but my Mom said it was not a smart idea since we could make that at home for cheaper. Similar comment was made just yesterday when she proudly said that the vegetable dish she made would have cot $10 in a restaurant but she paid $2 for the fresh version to cook. I am sure other people, other ethnic groups, have this idea, but some, like my Mother, like to make a point about it, get urgent about it. And from this environment I grew up thinking in numbers, mathematics, computer science, financial market, and others. Numbers tell us very precisely how well we have done from the perspective of shaping those numbers in whatever we are doing.
